Sue is a member of All Souls who. just before Christmas, helped us to put "names and faces" to our conversation about the HIV/Aids campaign we are supporting. She is English herself, but is only temporarily returned here to study before returning to Zambia where she lives.
I went to C of E primary school. That started me going to church as a child. My parents weren't churchgoers, so I went by myself! But in my teens, I became disillusioned with the church because of all the conflicts in the world, like Northern Ireland and the Middle East. They all seemed to involve religion. I became even more disillusioned with religion when I went to teach in Zambia, when I was in my early forties. Zambia was a supposedly Christian country, but the people professing to be Christian were having affairs, and corruption was rife. Witnessing this, I became even more opposed to religion.
I married my husband and became close to his family. Half of them were Christians. When my husband's brother and his wife died of Aids-related diseases, we cared for their three children. The youngest, Matthew, was a sickly child. My husband intimated that he might be HIV-positive. In the last year of Matthew's life, when he was 12, he wanted to go to church. I didn't want to take Matthew to a local Zambian church because they preached on hell and damnation, and I felt he didn&'t need to hear that, in his circumstances. I knew an American pastor and his wife because their children went to the school where I was deputy head teacher. They invited us to the church they were starting. We were the only people attending it, at first!
How hard was it to start going to church again after such a long absence?
I didn't like some of the teachings at the church. They were American evangelicals, teaching that you had to be frightened of God. They also maintained that women should stay at home, not work, and couldn't preach or even read in church, and they criticised other religions. The informal approach I've found at All Souls is a refreshing change! But the pastor and his wife were fantastic. I realized that not all Christians were hypocrites. I had always been a fatalist, convinced that certain things happen and there's nothing you can do about them. Going to church, I began to believe God had a divine plan for each of us.
Was there a specific moment when you committed yourself to Jesus?
Matthew died on May 16th 2004. Two Sundays later, I spoke to the pastor's wife after the Sunday service. She led me through some prayers and that was when I committed myself to Jesus. How did your faith help you through Matthew's illness and death? It definitely sustained me. As Matthew got sicker, it gave me support I hadn't had before. The pastor and his wife gave us brilliant pastoral care while Matthew was ill. Gradually, other members of the family started going to the church, even my husband! By the time Matthew died, he was going regularly! My faith helped me to be strong at the funeral. There were 250 people there, and I spoke out against the practice of being secretive about HIV. In Zambia there is a huge stigma attached to being HIV positive. People pretend they have malaria, or kidney failure, and won't get tested for the HIV virus. Then they don't get the drugs that can help them.
What do you feel is the key to making a difference to the HIV/Aids situation in communities like the one where you live, in Zambia?
Education is the key. I've seen people with HIV prescribed anti-retroviral (ARV) drugs, still having unprotected sex. We've got to get the message across to the 15-24-year-olds. A lot of work is being done to educate this group. We need to overcome the stigma of HIV/Aids and encourage people to get tested for the HIV virus. Alcohol is also a big problem. We need to show young people they can have fun without drinking. Cheaper ARV drugs will also help people to live longer. It will certainly enable people who can't afford expensive drugs to get ARV drugs for the wives of husbands who think it's OK to have sex with other women.
How has knowing Jesus changed you?
It has made me more tolerant and supportive of people's needs and problems. You can show people that there is an alternative. I've seen the value of church, prayer and worship. I wish the All Souls worship band could come and play at our church!
How have your friends reacted to your becoming a Christian?
No one in Zambia was critical, but British friends can be negative about it. They probably think I'm boring because I don't drink. But I'm quite a strong person, so maybe they don't dare say anything too blunt!
January 2007
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Sue is interviewed by Helene (whose "